Sunday, April 06, 2008

Sunday Morning--Let it be Known



I heard on NPR that scientists are trying to build a black hole and that there is a group of people who are trying to sue them to stop them. The scientists admitted that there is a chance their black hole could swallow everything, destroying Earth and everything else, but that it's unlikely.
I was writing in my diary about this and how I feel about it and had one particularly cantankerous thought which I will copy here:

"And I wonder about my little diary. You! Floating through space or another dimension, the only surviving artifact of our shitty little planet, carrying with you the seeds of corruption and beauty--an ugly little fruit just traveling through unknown and unintended fabrics of other time, sometimes scraping the fragments of other traveling minutiae, becoming striated, telling the story of your journey with these little injuries. Or maybe you never find a being to tell; maybe you just travel through and through, having infinite near-misses with meaning."

See, in this scenario, I have imagined that my diary is the only thing that survives annihilation. Naturally. Also, I've imagined that my diary is brimming with "seeds of corruption and beauty." When, in fact, it is merely a series of smallish scandals--at best. But it is positively festooned with self-aggrandizements. Just in case it does become the only surviving artifact of our existence. I do NOT want to be the evidence of a boring society. God sakes!
Do you know what it takes to be this narcissistic and self-obsessed? Man, a lot.

1 comment:

rosebuds said...

It's always the same when you wish something. I'm having the same trouble so often :(